Apotheosis

Let me start with Christianity for this one, so the archangels Michael (aka Saint Michael), Lucifer ( aka The Devil/Satan), Raphael, Gabriel(aka The Chancellor of Heaven), were the sons of God. Now all the statements in his post consider a general theology and are only being used for philosophical purposes and intellectual thinking, so don’t be an ass and just read on.

Narcissist

Each morning nowadays is a call for a different thought. Every time I wake up, I feel stress-free, relaxed, you can say. I have had a one-on-one with the real psyche of the human mind, now; have been in the real world now, I must say, I didn’t learn anything new about it. It’s the same, hypocritic, deceitful, greedy, miserable, arrogant, egoistic and stupid.

What I really fail to understand is the mere concept of survival, I mean what really is the difference in between a luxury car and a normal car? It gets old after a while, trust me, and the normal car stays for long. If you want to survive then take the normal car, but no, in comes the hypocritic notion of the human mind, it won’t be as comfortable, then stop talking about survival for God’s sake!

That Feeling

Vaguely do I remember the last time I felt that twinge, that feeling for anyone, and I haven't felt that in a long time.

Attachments

Sometimes everything seems so vague, just so poetic. Sometimes you just wait for something to happen, and sometimes you dread something about to happen, sometimes you just feel bad for things which never happened, attachments are of the worst kind, whether to your job, your people, your colleagues or that one person.

Today I did not do anything, but for me I did a lot, just to listen to a few words, you do something, because no conversation is happening between you anyway and you dread that maybe it might not happen and maybe you dread asking why.

Sometimes you're better off not asking the questions you don't want the answers to, more like you couldn't handle the answers to.

Little Things

Sometimes all it takes is a casual warm, greeting to change your day.  A horrid sequence of days, leading to a very callous routine of day-to-day life. Just a casual, normal, but polite sentence from a person you'd never be expecting from can change your day, can make it happy.

Wow, this emotional part of me is just useless.

Changes

Some Time Back

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Friday

6.00 pm

The girl's story

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This was the time and day she waited for, for him, this was the time she had gotten to see him, he used to come once a week for an hour, for one class. That was the only time she could see him. At 5.50 pm, each Friday evening, her heartbeat started rising up and it kept on acting that way until she reached the institute. One fine day, somehow she devised a plan with her friend to get his number and somehow she arranged for a way to get his number, without even him asking for her number. So they started texting for some time, no, it was not the way people texted nowadays, like all the time, all day and all night, but sometimes, casual and fun. She didn’t want him to know of her feelings.

Obviously, her friend knew, and she told her everything,  Linda was a really mature person, she had liked this 'teacher' for a very long time, and each time she told Shruti about this, it was emotions galore.

An Experiment With Myself

Now, this is an experiment I did, please do not try this if you are sensitive and emotional, as you are bound to get hurt.

Now imagine a woman in your workplace, a beautiful woman, for example, now she's well-read, conservative, the perfect girl-next-door kind of girl. She's 5 years younger than you and loves dogs. Too  much details, anyways, so, she has a similar work profile as you except she is a freelancer and you are an employee.

Now, earlier you were a freelancer at the same place, but, at that time she was really new and you thought she had an attitude problem and she was too young to talk to so you let it slide.

But, now you decide because of the age and the attitude she might be the perfect person to experiment.

The Neutral

I am not a spiritual teacher, but once I was reading a book and it made me wonder.

'What in the world is zero?'

is it the ultimate master of peace? The emptiness, the nothingness, the 'neutral'?

To answer this question we must first think ourselves. When are we most at peace, after doing what activities do we feel at peace?

But before that, another thing, like in a P.S. kind of moment. We only have peace when we are doing what we are doing, when we are instilled in it perfectly, whenever we are focusing on it, when we are in the moment. In other words, we get peace, when whatever we are doing we do religiously, with the utmost focus.

Cheat Codes

I bought a game on my new iPhone. It was a fantastic game with a lot of action, some fantasy, some sword-fighting, some good combos, a fantastic storyline, you get the gist, oh and let's not forget the beautiful graphics, credits to the Unreal™ engine which provides the backbone to its graphics. So, after playing for quite a few days, it is an awesome game, really, I realised I got stuck at one point or another just because of some credits or battle chips. I used to moan and cringe each time I would not have enough of those to level up, or probably buy a new weapon or potion, so I thought let's look for a cheat or a glitch or something which would provide me with easy money.

The Warrior's Last Battle

Laying on the road, the warrior breathed,

He was wounded, his armor broken, his sword sheathed.

But among his heart and mind remained that line,

"Your country, your wife and your daughter will be mine."

It was 3 days back when he was challenged,

By a man so wicked, you could say he was deranged.

The warrior didn't raise a finger and simply said,

"Oh, noble man, accept my defeat instead."

The Missing Toy

"Vroooooooooooom……vroooooooom……." curdled Mitesh.

Playing with his toy cars on the kitchen slab, he giggled with joy, as the spring-loaded toy cars made the sound he was trying to imitate.

"Vrooooooooom…….."

Teeheeheeheehee.

He was having so much fun, laughing, yelling, clapping. He was just a 4-year old.

"Vroom, vroom, vrooooooom……"

"MITEEEESHHHHHHH!"

He heard his mother call him upstairs to the room where his grandmother and grandfather stayed.

"Yesssss…….mummyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy………….."

Finders Keepers

Sometimes things just happen to lie around the corner. When you're looking for some cookies and you don’t find them for days, but suddenly, when you are lying around in the bed and you find them there, it feels amazing. Sometimes, when you ,lost your earphones you think you have lost them forever, but one fine day, suddenly, you find them near your cupboard.

I have lost a zillion things, and found them almost instantly. But, when I lose something and find it after a certain period of time, it feels like bliss. Similar is the feeling when you are looking for something in one place away from you, very much away from you, and you find it there where you are located. Feels good and amazing.

Passion

'I am a passionate person. When I work, I work with passion, when I love, I love with passion. What's wrong with me? Can't I be a little selfish?', thought Siddharth.

Siddharth is an amazing person, whenever he does things, he does them no holds barred. But, sometimes he tends to overreact over small issues.

Like when he sees someone slacking off for the same thing he likes to work on passionately, he feels instant rage, and wants to kill off the person, and the only way he prevents this is by letting a friend know about some of his thoughts, in order to cool off.

Like when he loves a girl, he goes badcrap crazy for her, he pulls out all the stops, throws his ego and dignity out the window, sometimes this love causes error in judgement and he ends up losing the person he loves.

It has almost been an year.

He thought maybe this time things would turn out differently.

I lost her because of the girl who never loved me back, at least she cared for me.

But there was no light of hope.

Let's think positive .Thinking negative can lead to no good.

The Woman

She was sitting at her desk, browsing the recent posts on her homepage for Facebook. She saw a post summarizing a story of a woman who had been sexually harassed by her father for 12 years, then how she withstood the world living in fear, experiencing more traumatizing events in her life, even though it had a trigger warning, she read it.

Even  the world did not consider her a sexual harassment victim, she knew she had been harassed indirectly by the one she had loved. Maybe, that's why she read it, to know how a woman deals with all this, how a woman feels after it happens, how betrayed one feels, how afraid. It was so deep, it rocked her to her very core, she could relate to her fear. How she wasn't safe, maybe the world is like that, savage, but maybe it  is more for women, maybe not, but this was not something which could be solved by the provision reserved seats in trains, or education or anywhere else, maybe justice can be served after things conspire, but that justice cannot change what has happened.

What is the need for justice to be served? isn't prevention better than cure? Or is vengeance a bigger or more important trait than peace?

Well, maybe, peace is war.

Move On

He was sitting alone in his room, on the bed, using his laptop to (not) watch his favourite movie. As the feature moved along, he became restless, he could not focus on the movie to distract his mind, put his mind at ease.

He had texted her so many times, even chatted at length with her for 1 or 2 nights, but, still, it seemed that he wasn't piquing her interest. He knew for a fact that she liked him earlier, but now, zilch.

It almost brought a tear into his eye. It had almost been an year since he had asked her out. He was hoping to get her interested into talking with him, but nothing seemed to work.

He had not noticed the signs of her affection before, just thought that she was being nice. He had always thought from the beginning that she was way too out for his league, maybe that is why he didn't get the signs, maybe that or that he was too dumb.

He had fallen in love with another girl then, and when she broke up with him, by helping him move on, she had just moved on herself. But, then, why had she kept his number on her phone still, why after all this time?

Depression

People who are depressed resemble the heartbroken too much. That is why, we might sometimes mistake them for people who have been ditched by someone and some of us geniuses might think that mocking their 'crush' would make them overcome it.

Be'life'

I have changed. I have become 'mature'. Earlier, I used to believe in useless things such as destiny, love, feelings, oneness, togetherness, emotions and bonds. Now I believe in success, profit, work, career, benefit, behaviour, political correctness and the list may go on.

It's not that I have become depressed, or that I am weak. Weak people don't keep on trying until it's over, it's just that, I have given up, I have stopped believing, stopped thinking about destiny, stopped believing in chemistry, in people.

That kind of happens, when you try and try again to look for the good in people, look for the love hidden in them, look for something human left in them, and you lose. That happens when you believe too much and keep on trying, until your belief is nothing more than what it is, a six-letter word standing for a myth. Nothing more than a word, it just remains where it was, in your heart, in your body, in your soul.